A few weeks ago we shared a post on how to be the best best man ever. So we figured, seeing as we’ve been talking all things bachelorette parties and bridesmaids over the last few weeks, it was the perfect time to reflect on what makes a magnificent maid of honour too. Being asked to be a bridesmaid is a big deal, your friend best brides ever giving you the honour of being part of her inner circle on her wedding day.
And with great privilege, comes great responsibility. But, if you’ve said yes to the job, she should be able to rely on you to lend a hand, show some interest, and throw her one heck of a bachelorette party! Still not sure what’s expected of you as a bridesmaid? We’ve come up with 10 commandments for being your buddy’s best lady in the lead up to her wedding.
Your friend is no doubt excited about her big day, and chances are she wants to talk about her plans. They often feel talking about their wedding could be selfish or boring, so will refrain from waxing lyrical about dress styles and catering options. Encourage your friend to talk about her wedding, ask questions, and be interested. She’ll feel so much better about explaining her inner conflict over stationery fonts. She could be getting hit with lots of wedding questions, and feel like her whole life is revolving around this one day.
So from time to time, make sure you talk about anything other than her wedding plans. Your role as a wedding dress shopping confidant is a tricky one, you need to strike a balance between being constructive, but not putting your best friend off the dress of her dreams. But at the end of the day, remember, it’s about about her style and taste, not yours. A few weeks ago we talked about the mix and match bridesmaid trend, and how we love when brides embrace their girls’ individuality. While your bride can’t ask you to wear heels you can’t walk in, or dye your signature pink hair brown, when it comes to the dress, it’s just for one day, so it’s often better not to stress your pal out about it.
As long as she doesn’t make you wear something three sizes too small, do your bridesmaidly duty and suck it up, put it on, and smile! Make your friend feel special in the lead up to her wedding, especially around her engagement and in the final weeks of planning. Make every get together an excuse for bubbly, send her excited texts in the lead up to her day, or take her out for a stress free day of shopping. From getting a facial together to hosting a BBQ for her and her partner, weddings aren’t just one day, it’s a whole exciting time, so show your bride you’re happy for her and want to celebrate every step of the way. Perhaps the bride in your life wants something a little more low key. A weekend on a farm, a spa break, or a karaoke slumber party, think about the elements that would make your friend’s perfect day, night, or weekend, and incorporate them into a personalised hen party she’ll never forget.
The most helpful thing you can do for your friend is to get jobs ticked off her list, rather than give her one more task, of finding something to delegate to you. Don’t just tell your bride to let you know if she needs anything, offer your services for specific tasks or take something off her hands entirely. Tell her you can address and post the invites, assure her you’ll steam her dress on the morning of her wedding, collect the boutonnières from the florist or look after making up the activity packs for the kids. It’s practical help like that, that’s invaluable in the lead up to the wedding. This kind of goes without saying, but try to get on with the other bridesmaids.
But the last thing your friend needs on the morning of your wedding is to break up your squabbling over who gets to button up her dress for the photographs! It’s the little touches that takes a great bridesmaid to the next level of awesomeness. And those touches don’t have to cost a thing. You might normally be the first one to duck off on a night out, but when you’re a bridesmaid, you’re on the clock as long as your bride is still up and at ’em. Hit the dancefloor if it empties out after a not-so-great song, make sure your mate eats something and has plenty of water, and try not to drink too much yourself. Of course you should relax and enjoy the party, but just remember, your friend might need a hand unhitching those 47 buttons down the back of her dress at the end of the night.
